Wednesday, November 09, 2005
here are some lies--they're pulling me down: Help me help me help me
"i feel my academic capabilities saturate! im afraid that im an underdog of my undergraduate Engineering batchmates. i do know why i feel this way but it seems impossible to draw the contours as to why i feel so. i know i shouldve outgrown the enthusiasm for this field, but electronics is a subject thats just too wide to understand for an underdog like me. i can try to like it but pretentions easily fail. i dont know how to attack problems in the exams, funny how my classmates say, exams are the ones that attack us."
These are lies formed by my wild imagination! The more i keep meditating on these lies, the more it comes into place. Bcoz i know that the ONLY attitude towards this kind of situation is What Is He Trying To Tell Me. If there's anything id ask for is the grace to understand this kind of circumstance of having myself drained in lies more than to understand how a differential and operational amplifier works.
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
the last term of my first half in school 
Saturday, April 16, 2005
I knew everything was planned. I was sure i'd fail my engineering economy class. I even got over the thought of it and i actually planned taking it after several terms. To my surprise, i saw a line before that heartbreaking '.' and '0'. I swear i almost had a heart attack before receiving that course card. I couldnt breathe for a moment or two and even my infected and creepy( i hav a lump in my left eye ) eyes couldn't believe what it was seeing. Right in front and there, i received a 1.0 from a subject i hated the most this term. Something was just sweeping my mind yesterday. I felt really calm going early to school but ironically i expected my major subjects to fail. i was wrong and yesterday was just a synchronized miracle i was praying for.
adding to my 'interesting' yesterday, i met faith and of course wit her bubbly aura, she cheered me up minutes before doom-hour. i had lunch wit norms and kat, it was fun.
i actually love the term that has just ended? boy i love the Conductor of this synchronized symphony of miracle.
Saturday, April 09, 2005
"Today is what you called tomorrow yesterday and reversely, today is what you will call yesterday tomorrow"
today is the every tomorrows and the every yesterdays.
Tomorrow comes today!
and i'm wondering how to spend my todays...
i figured the coolest job under the skies! and guess what its not completely related to my nerdy and geeky course. a researcher for Discovery channel is the most mind blowing job i can think of today! imagine working everyday with awe, traveling the seven seas and climbing the highest peak and flying like a seagull and venturing the deepest blue and meeting the most exotic cultures and people, i only wish Discovery channel would air Lonely planet once again. i think it would an exhilarating one. but that is only a 'dream' job. i don't really expect this to happen, though. i just gave this a thought. isnt it cool.
the mind lifts you sometimes when you meditate about a sweet future as this one :P
.................
knock knock knock Trix
who's there?
and then i've crashed to the runway of the port of what most of you call Reality.
Thursday, April 07, 2005
my mind has been entertaining radical thoughts that would make significant change in my life. i could only avoid this thought for now because it's finals week -- my mind has to attend to more urgent priorities as reviewing.
if i could make an equation describing my future it would be this:
f(x) = Acosx
where x: the result of this term ( which is due next week, by the way)
a cosine function only indicates a wavering decision...
this is what is up wit me... while i feel down.. but that is only for now.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
hey i've been listening to real music for nights. check out these great tracks from great artists. something different yet so relaxing. go ahead and shoot the cd ur kaMU/boyfriend/girlfriend/suitor/parang-kayo-pero-hinde/special friend(and all those shit) gave u.
- coldplay - in my place
- craig armstrong - this love
- dj shadow - midnight in a perfect world
- innocence mission - u are the light
- badly drawn boy - the shining
- stevie nicks - touched by an angel
- marcy playground - opium
- frou frou - let go
...u aint cool when u wont like em :P
Monday, January 17, 2005
Be still now
I am with you,
I am deep within you;
You are at peace.
You cannot be harmed;
You will not suffer.
Breathe deeply,
Breathe in the healing love of the universe,
And breathe out the sickness which has taken you.
I am with you.
It's easy it's like breathing, its like a heartbeat, it's easy
Have not betrayed your ideals
Your ideals betrayed you
What are you going to do?
Your eyes will not close
Your tongue barely speaks
But I can still feel you
I can still feel you
So come, come relax,
Grin, let the changes in
Come on, come relax
Grin,
Let the laughter, let the laughter
Let the laughter begin
Relax, grin, let the changes in.
Time is done
The sun has gone
It's too late
Eternity has come.